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World's a Mess

Every week or so, Alex Smith and James Kislingbury wade through the cesspool is that is the modern news cycle to find you chunks of solid gold-- Meaning mostly stories about crows and drunken brawls at fast food joints.
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World's a Mess
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Now displaying: Page 1
Feb 17, 2018

EPISODE #85-- Today Alex and James talk about a French baboon breakout, bad cops in Canada being lightweights, and a dumb teen taking down the west's entire security apparatus. They also talk Trader Joe's, zoo foods, and insane revelations about James' family. Also holograms. Or, rather, "holograms." Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Vice, Guardian, and Telegraph. #Canada #Hackers #Hackers2 #France #Zoo #Animals #Baboons #2High2Cop #Edibles #Weed #ElliotGould #RastaLife

Feb 9, 2018

EPISODE #84-- We're back and today we got stories about a prison break-in, a peacock, and more dumb tech-bro stuff (this time with more flamethrowers). We also talk made mess on survivalists, JK Rowling, and proper shopping car etiquette. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Guardian, Live and Let Fly, and CBS News. #Amish #ShoppingCarts #ADA #Ablism #ElonMusk #FlameThrowers #Hitchbot

Feb 6, 2018

EPISODE #83-- On today's episode Alex and James rap about the intersection of metal, clown, and drugs, as well as unusual whitening treatments, the worst husband ever, and a trip down memory road with an early 2000's lad magazine. Also Jeff Sessions sucks. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Vice, CBS, WKMG, Maxim Magazine, and Newsweek.

Jan 27, 2018

EPISODE #82-- Sorry for the delay! One of these days we're going to get our act together. In the mean time, we got stories about the "raw water" "craze" that is sweeping dumb white America, criminal small clams, and one more reason (of many) why you shouldn't be a transphobe. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Vice, Munchies, New York Times, Ars Technica, TC Palm, and Pride. #BeCool #BeKind #SmallClamsCourt #Coke #Dome #Soda #Florida #MLKDay #Jets #RastaLife

Jan 19, 2018

EPISODE #81-- Braving heat and cold, the boys are back with a new crop of dumb stories. Today we've got a woman who ate ten too many tamales, a teacher getting busted for being a Nazi, what to do and what not to do when you encounter a frozen iguana, and another gross story about Trump AKA America's Grossest President. All this and more and Tim Allen sucks. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Food Beast, The Root, NPR, Wall Street Journal, and New York Times. #TrumpSucks #Impeach45 #Florida #Lizards #Reptiles #RepLife #PunchMoreNazis #WeatherMen #RastaLife

Jan 15, 2018

EPISODE #80-- The last of 2017's backlog! Today we got a drunk possum, the tragedy of North Korean ghost ships, and the world's dumbest sex predator. All this and more. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Atlas Obscura, NBC Washington, and AV Club. #Possum #Friendo #SexPest #KevinSpacy #TimesUp #Florida #Drinkin #NorthKorea #ItMe #PoppyThePossum #RastaLife

Jan 11, 2018

EPISODE #79-- In what might be our best and "best" episode yet, Alex and James (and Deanna) tackle mob-run strip clubs, naked men fighting trucks, and robo-cops. Plus we trash Frank Rizzo (may he rot in hell), Old New York, doggos, and a bunch of other trash. It's great. It's so good. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Atlas Obscura, NBC Washington, and AV Club. #FrankRizzoSucks #Washington #Doggos #NewJersey #TheSopranos #TeenWolfOfTheNarcissus #OhMan #BoxingDay #RastaLife

Jan 3, 2018

EPISODE #78-- Oh, wait, actually this is the episode with the potato gun. It's been a weird week. I thought my dad might die again. Good news, he didn't! Anyways, we got that and a story about a hungry bear, moonshine, Steven Mnuchin's (alleged) coprophilic mail order problem, and potato guns. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at CBC, Juneau Empire, CBS News, LA Times, AL.com, KPCC, and Vice. Support journalism! #Bears #Alaska #Canada #Trumpistan #PicketFences #Taters #Thunderroad #Thunderbird #Drinkin #RastaLife

Dec 30, 2017

EPISODE #77-- As we round the year out, let's remember what matters most in our lives: The Wu Tang Clan. We also have stories about undersea blood explosions and the war on ISIS (via porno). All this and more. Get it. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at CNBC, Vice, and Motherboard. #Shaolin #WuTang #Blood #Canada #WarOnTerror #WarOnXmas #RastaLife

Dec 23, 2017

EPISODE #76-- Today (almost) all of our stories are from the Guardian. Our stories include a sleepy bandit, a jerk drinking poison thirty years too late, dumb installation art, and Judge Ghost Hunter. All this and more on today's World's a Mess. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Guardian, Reuters, and Vice. Support real journalist. #XMas #CandleNights #Holidays #Christmas #CrystalMass #Crimbles #Krimbus

Dec 16, 2017

EPISODE #75-- Today Alex and James celebrate the season by talking about the most terrifying and dumb news that they can find (and also the New Kids on the Block). Today they got stories about Special Forces V. Special Forces murder, a weed bazooka (naturally), and Narcs V. Narcs (where everybody wins). Also some other dumb stuff. Get it. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Daily Beast, Vice, and FOX 2 Detroit. #SOCOM #BROCOM #RogueWarrior #Detroit #Cops #WarOnDrugs #Mexico #Donnie #Rastalife

Dec 9, 2017

EPISODE #74-- Today we talk about gunmen at McDonald's, Mexican cartels making pesos off of octopuses, and a dude shooting himself in the wee-wee. We also talk about the effulgent Lizzo, 'Nam, Jim Ladd, and how transphobes should be headbutted non-stop, always. Amen. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at MSN, WTAE, War is Boring, and Food Beast (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #FastFoodWars #DingDongs #Pennsylvania #WarOnDrugs #Octopussy #Rastalife

Dec 1, 2017

EPISODE #73-- Beyond failed palindromes, we got the news! Today we tackle Louisiana's horrifying justice system, Alex Trebeck doing the drogas, and what kind of smut and games Osama Bin Laden was into shortly before 45 different Navy SEALs shot him in the face and butt. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at AP, CBS News, Onion AV CLub, and NY Post (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #PrisonIndustrialComplex #McGruff #NavySEALs #UBL #WarOnTerror #Jeopardy #RastaLife

Nov 26, 2017

EPISODE #72-- We're back and ready for more news! Today Alex and James talk about being drunk on a horse (in Florida, of course, of course), Papa John's alleged (but probable) collaboration with the Third Reich, and an Aussie living high on the hog "Blank Check" style. All this and Morrissey on today's show! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at AP, CBS News, Onion AV CLub, and NY Post (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #Florida #Drinking #Horses #NaziJerks #Australia #RastaLife

Nov 26, 2017

SPECIAL-- Today Alex and James hang up their news hats to put on an arguably even more important piece of headgear: Their Nazi-killing hats. This episode is a one-off where in James explains Wolfenstein 2: The New Colossus to Alex, who does not believe that anything in that game actually happens (it does). SPOILER ALERT: There will be spoilers. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X.

Nov 21, 2017

EPISODE #71-- Hey, this episode has some fun corrections and omissions and it's only been a week since we recorded! Anyways, enough about Morrissey, today we got a show about the spam black market, how not to clean your female anatomy, and the recycling, reuse, and abuse of Soviet war memorials. All this and more and Alex's CD corner! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at Food Beast, Comic Book dot com, and NY Post (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #Spam #BlackMarket #Cleanse #Wellness #BS #Russia #Rastalife

Nov 13, 2017

EPISODE #70-- We're back and better than ever. James got fired. After we talk about losing our stupid jobs, we get into the real business. The News Business. Today we got stories about a street smart ninja in New York, another dude torching his home trying to kill god's creatures, and a story about German hamsters causing havoc. This and other BS. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at Kotaku, Daily Examiner, and The Local (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #Hamsters #ninja #spiders #Boruto #Rastalife

Nov 9, 2017

EPISODE #69-- Today Alex and James tackle news stories on Billy Corgan spotting aliens, fraudulent fried chicken, wild turkeys running wild, and an elderly ninja thief. We also talk about our love of bad, old Hondas, as well as how Johnny Depp still sucks and how amazing Author: The JT Leory story is. Donate at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at CBS News, AV Club, Spin, Munchies, Longbeachize, Time Magazine, and BBC (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #FoodWars #Ninja #Aliens #TomDelonge #90sParanoiacs #Rastalife

Nov 2, 2017

EPISODE #68-- Today we fight our way through Smith family history, then we move onto more interesting things like stealing from a dead man, getting too high on top of a mountain, and kissing a fish to death. We also get into it about dumb 90's t-shirt brands and the worst accent from James yet, innit? Donate at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath.   Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com).  Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at National Post, TMZ, and K2 Radio (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #OopNorth #Fish #WarOnDrugs #History #DNA #Scotland #DeadBody #RastaLife

Oct 30, 2017

EPISODE #67-- Today on the news we've got radioactive pigs, Marilyn Manson being punished by a vengeful God, and time-travelling under the influence. Donate at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath.   Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com).  Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at National Post, TMZ, and K2 Radio (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #Pigs #Radiation #Fallout #Manson #DUI #Drinking #RastaLife

Oct 23, 2017

EPISODE #66-- Neither rain, nor sleet, nor sudden unemployment is going to keep us away from the news. Today we get into it about McD's and sweet lady cocaine, the abject stupidity of Rick and Morty's most ardent fans, and a bummer story about a murder that I thought would be funny and then it wasn't, so I cut a bunch of it out, because there's no real joy in that one. My bad. Donate at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath.   Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com).  Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at Vice, Time, and Brandenton (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). #Hollywood #Florida #Hurrican #WarOnDrugs #Coke #FastFoodWars #Sauce #StupidJerks #RastaLife

Oct 18, 2017

EPISODE #65-- Today Alex and James get into it about a couple doing gross stuff in a Burger King besides just eating at Burger King, North Korea's parking ticket woes, a topless car wash for the cops, and, most importantly, a brief check-in with the world's mind control situation. Plus other junk. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Donate at Patreon.com/quality.  Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com).  Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at Vice, New Mexican, and KKTV 11 (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). Please support real journalism. Subscribe to something today! #FastFood #BurgerKing #NorthKorea #CopVoice #RastaLife #MKUltra

Oct 12, 2017

EPISODE #64-- Today Alex and James get into it about a maniac serial pooper, an erotic burger thief, and what people will do in order to get high in prison. We also talk about how Mark Wahlberg is a dirtbag, drugs in general, and Frasier. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Donate at Patreon.com/quality.  Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com).  Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at Vice, New Mexican, and KKTV 11 (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). Please support real journalism. Subscribe to something today! #WarOnDrugs #Wahlberg #Dook #Hobos #Frasier #Fastfood #Snowfall #ButtStuff

Oct 2, 2017

EPISODE #63-- Today's newsblast involves a jerk failing to correctly use sign language, a cop flipping his lid over spilled soda, and a dead body found on a TV set. Alex and James also get into it about ants, how much American mascots suck, the state of modern American police work, and how we should treat sex workers like, you know, human begins. I'm 90% certain Facebook won't pick up this ad because I used that term. Anyways: Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Donate at Patreon.com/quality.  Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com).  Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at New York Post, Alabama, AOL, and BBC (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). Please support real journalism. Subscribe to something today! 

Sep 28, 2017

EPISODE #62-- After a brief, but necessary delay, the boys are back, recharged and full of glorious news. Today they tackle the issues of the. . . day, with stories on a nun-based robbery, some prophylactic meth candles, and, most importantly, cannibal ennui. We also have the return of Alex's Music Corner and, you know, other stuff. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Donate at Patreon.com/quality.  Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com).  Our theme music is "The World's a Mess (It's In My Kiss)" by X. Thanks to our sources at New York Post, Fox Philadelphia 29, and IOL News (and see our Facebook page for more sources!). Please support real journalism. Subscribe to something today! #WarOnDrugs #WarOnCandles #Nuns #Heist #Robbery #Mendo #SouthernLaw #Nonsense

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