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World's a Mess

Every week or so, Alex Smith and James Kislingbury wade through the cesspool is that is the modern news cycle to find you chunks of solid gold-- Meaning mostly stories about crows and drunken brawls at fast food joints.
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World's a Mess
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Now displaying: 2018
Dec 21, 2018

EPISODE #116-- We're back (more or less) and today we talk about a turtle with a drug problem, a murder over a PS4 game, a controversy involving darts and farts, and the mysterious case of the hungry bears! All this and more! Plus we talk about how much Johnny Depp sucks, Mac Tonight, and some other nonsense. Come and get it. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @NoACSlater. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Takeout, Spin, People, ABC News, and Reuters! Please support real news! #Florida #DirtySouth #BearNews #WarOnDrugs #HantaVirus #SonicTheHedgehog #Pokemon

Dec 11, 2018

EPISODE #115-- We are back and worse than ever! Today we talk about a man in a Florida Walmart not practicing basic gun safety, an LSD ring on an aircraft carrier, a dummy paying his bill with socks, and Trent Reznor doing the Lord's work with Texas' least favorite son. Plus we rap about the finale of Breaking Bad, Constantine, and Ben Mendelsohn sightings. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @NoACSlater. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at AZN/Arizona Republic, The Takeout, Business Insider, and Spin #Texas #Nin #Music #FloridaMan #GunViolence #GroinViolence #GoldenAgeOfTV #WereBack #Hellblazer #WarOnDrugs

Nov 10, 2018

EPISODE #114b-- Today we go back to some cut material from episode #114 (the one with British James), which is total nonsense, as well as an update on the status of the show! This is a place-holder episode, but we will be back soon, I swear! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @NoACSlater. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X.

Oct 14, 2018

EPISODE #114-- After a long period of fermentation, the podcast is back with a guest from across the pond. James Smith joins the show to talk about Little Xan's medical maladies, the geographic impossibilities of building a Saharan border wall, a drunk trying to steal some monkeys, and the mysterious case of would-be murderer/zoo keeper Joe Exotic. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @NoACSlater. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at NZ Herald, BBC, Guardian, Crimefeed, and the Orlando Sentinel. #Zoo #Catpeople #Snacks #Tea #WhaleMeat #CheetohStomach #BenWheatly #OtherThings #Guest #Hitman #Tigers #

Sep 30, 2018

EPISODE #113-- Alex/Marcus Slater is back and better than ever. While Original-flavor Alex is out of town, James and our guest talk about Brett Kavanaugh, grandma's shooting gators, a fig tree murder mystery, a jerk abusing the system, and the worst gender reveal party ever. All this and more. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @NoACSlater. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at CNBC, Dallas Daily News, Washington Post, and Daily Beast. #GuestStar #Naruto #Justice #SupremeCourt #BelieveWomen #Texas #Gators #Cyprus #NotCypress #DrGreenThumb #TPUSA

Sep 23, 2018

EPISODE #112-- On this particularly wondrous episode, the boys talk about Jon Stewart saving underground goats, drama around Donald Trump's dumb star, and a UFC fighter versus a drill. PLUS: The return of Spy/Author/Mind's Eye. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Reuters, Daily Beast, Vice, and Vice Sports. #Nuts #UFC #MMA #HomeImprovement #TimAllen #BobVilla #ThisOldHouse #MaineAccents #Birch #Teak #Balsa #Oak #Hardwood #Softwood #Mediumwood #LastManStanding

Sep 15, 2018

EPISODE #111-- We're back and we're talking about weed deals in New York City (go pound sand Cuomo and De Blasio, you feckless dumps), a mysterios case of ancient DOOM CHEESE, and San Fran's newly minted/unminted Dook Patrol. All this and more. It's a good one. Follow James on Twitter @kislingtwits and on Instagram @kislingwhatsit. You can watch Cruz and show favorite Alexis Simpson on You Tube in "They Live Together." Thanks to our artists Julius Tanag (http://www.juliustanag.com) and Sef Joosten (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). #NewYork #Egypt #California #SanFrancisco #Mummies #VinceStaples

Sep 8, 2018

EPISODE #110-- Today we talk about, what else? A dude convicted for trying to blow up a statue, a golf course melee, and Floridian politicians acting exactly how you thought they would. Plus, we got some audio problems and we talk about monsters, digital monsters, and the like.  Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Associated Press, Miami Herald, CNN. #Florida #Hogs #MonsterTalk #Dragula #Digimon #DigitalMonsters #DigimonAreTheChampions #SwordOfDoom #Confederacy

Aug 30, 2018

EPISODE #109-- Today Alex and James cut straight through the fat and get to a story about a Russian government official embezzling from Putin, the mysterious case of the missing toads, a cold-case freezer geezer, and a heartwarming story of a drunk and his gator. All this and more. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Meduza, ABC 15, ABC Action News, and the Associated Press. #Florida #Toads #LickingFrogs #WarOnDrugs #ThiefOfThieves #Russia #Seattle #Gators

Aug 23, 2018

EPISODE #108-- What's this one about? Oh, right, today we talk about a free-wheeler at a gym, America's love affair with messing up prophylatics, and a drug dog with a cartel bounty on its head. All this and more Married With Children talk and some first grade geography facts. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Washington Post, CBS Boston, WBZTV, CDC, Daily Mail, and Insight Crime. #Crime #WarOnDrugs #Dogs #Africa #Namibia #FamilyPlanning #WrapItUp #Vaping

 
Aug 18, 2018

EPISODE #107-- Today we start talking about the news and then quicky spiral out into some madhouse tangents. Beyond that we talk about food built to take out teens, some marital aids being confused for something else, and an out-of-date discussion on that compound in New Mexico. This is a hairy one, folks. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Washington Post, Newsweek, and The State. #Teens #Trends #TigerBear #Food #MaritalAids #OtherEuphamisms #WarOnTerror #NewMexico #WildStuff #RealBummerStoriesActually

Aug 8, 2018

EPISODE #106-- It's way too hot to do anything but listen to podcasts, folks. Today Alex and James talk about everyone's favorite insane South-Asian president apologize to God, a shark taking out influencers in Australia, and a French gangster doing the fliest prison escape ever. All this and ICP, Los Feliz bar talk, and the Kislingbury Comic Korner. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at CBN, Fox News, NY Post, and Le Monde. #Australia #France #Prison #Furry #ICP #Detroit #Phillipines #Sharks #Crocs #PrisonBreak

Jul 28, 2018

EPISODE #105-- Today we talk about woodchucks eating Paul Ryan's (mom's) car, a man with no arms stabbing somebody (allegedly), and another story on the misguided youth of Supreme Court nominee, Brett Kavanaugh. All this and a real long yarn about a cocaine dealer/reptile guy. All this and more. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the AP, Miami Herald, Yale Daily News, and NPR. #Lizards #WarOnDrugs #MovingWeight #Reptiles #Woodchucks #Justice #SupremeCourt #Emeralds #BelieveWomen #CreepyEastCoastPrepSchoolPr*cks #BelieveWomen #KavaNah

Jul 23, 2018

EPISODE #104-- We're back and we brought some weird audio problem with us! So, buckle up, get excited and listen to some stories about cop being bad at burgers, the troubles with adopting raccoons, how dumb Brett Kavanaugh is, and the latest, dumbest idea to stop school shooters. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Takeout, Percolately, Washington Post, and Gizmodo. #UnitedStatesOfMeathooks #JudicialWatch #Baseball #Raccoon #BabyAnimals #SupremeCourt #FastFoodWatch #Dirt #Kavanaugh #BelieveWomen #Ford #GeorgetownPrep

Jul 14, 2018

EPISODE #103-- Today Alex and James run out of energy discussing fecal-related road rage, the bone-deep love of Man and Car, a guy finding out the hard way that his vest isn't stab-proof, and the Philly Phanatic strikes again. Plus, we talk about the Amish, Tim Horton's, and the end of Sanjuro. All this and more! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at CBS Local, Associated Press, Motherboard, Independent, and 6 ABC. #Dook #Pennsylvania #Philadelphia #Kansas #MascotsAreTroops #RoadRage

Jul 8, 2018

EPISODE #102-- Alex continues his two episode streak after being let back into the podcasting studio, and what treasures do we have for your today? Today we talk about Rand Paul's dumb baby ribs, bad neighbors, the North Koreas having unprotected interfacing with your computers, hot dog water, robot kicking, and the terrible app-based apocalypse that is coming for us all. All this and more! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Mashable, Vice, The Takeout, and SF Gate. #Robots #Apps #TheCounselor #RidleyScott #NorthKorea #Hacking #Hackers #RandPaul #Ribs #Rideshare #Etc

Jun 29, 2018

EPISODE #101-- On this lengthy episode, Alex returns to talk seltzer, CRISPR, Domino's Pizza's infrastructure plan, lying kids, a really cool DUI DOA, and the fraudster Fyre Festival founder's frequent felonies. All this and more! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Cincinnati.com, Fortune, and Yahoo. #Drinking #Dominos #Pizza #FyreFestival #GeneEditing #Hamsters #DUI #ReturnOfTheRastaLife

Jun 18, 2018

EPISODE #100-- Today James is joined by another Alex to talk the news. Alex Slater (on twitter as @NoACSlater and of LAMusicBlog.com) joins James to talk about rattlesnake bites, Trump's inability to not suck, a DUI in an APC, the California Primary Voter's Guide, and a ninjitsu-based robbery. All this and more! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at People Magazine, NY Post, KTLA 5, and WSBTV. #Drinkin #Guest #Ninja #Jutsu #Trump #DUI #APC #Voting #VoteVoteVote #WhiteHouse #Washington #DumbestNewsEver

Jun 10, 2018

EPISODE #99-- Sorry for the delays, folks, but we're almost back on schedule! In the mean time, enjoy this insane kaleidoscopic journey through stories on doing (or not doing) lines of grandpa's ashes, hacking a phone with a dead man's finger prints, and the dearly departed dude who DIY'd his own vaccines. It's a party. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Associated Press, WRIC/ABC 8, Live Science, and Fox News. #DoingLs #GrandpaNews #Biohacking #RegularHacking #HackThePlanet #WarOnDrugs

May 24, 2018

EPISODE #98-- Today Alex and James talk angry badgers in Scotland, a spoiled brat running away to Bali, and the mystery case of TEN-THOUSAND TORTOISES. All this and we talk about TMNT, how dumb Scottish history is, and how useless and terrible Matt Lauer is. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Follow us on tumblr at https://worldsamess.tumblr.com/. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at the Guardian and National Geographic. #Turtles #ReptileNews #Badger #Scotland #Highlander #Eastman #Laird #Australia #DumbKids #RastaLife

May 16, 2018

EPISODE #97-- For today's stories we got a spate of kangaroo attacks, a man with a vendetta against cars, and the great Coor's Light caper of 2018. Plus we talk about The Fast and the Furious, Andy Griffith, local ads, and a bunch of other dumb BS. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at The Independent, Tampa Bay Times, SF Gate. #Coors #Beer #Drinking #Florida #LasVegas #Reagan #Drugs #Magic

May 7, 2018

EPISODE #96-- Crime doesn't pay. . . And neither does podasting. Today we got stories about an aptly named male escort/cop, bootleg Disney figures with a terrible surprise, a would-be death metal suicide pact, and an Aussie who will not be dissuaded from a drink. All this and some really, truly terrible Scottish accents. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at NY Post, Vice, WSBTV, Guardian, and Scotsman. #Georgia #Australia #NewYork #Scotland #UK #Crime #DeathMetal #LifeAlert #Mystery #Poirot #EarthWormJerky

May 1, 2018

EPISODE #95-- We have an accidental theme episode! Today we tackle the case of the wind-blown cocaine, the mystery of the mouse-bitten weed, and the peril of the pizza attack. Plus, James tells us how he got the hantavirus. All this and more! Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at NY Post, Associated Press, Guardian, and Crime Watch. #Crime #Ohio #Florida #Weed #Mice #Coke #WarOnDrugs #WarOnFriendos #CriterionCollection

Apr 26, 2018

EPISODE #94-- We're back and in prime form. On today's episode we talk about the seagull pepperoni fiasco, a Toys R Us rave (and Toys R Us itself), and another gun rights dummy being a dumb dummy. All this and a bunch more regional jokes. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at Buzzfeed, Variety, and the BBC. #Seagull #Pepperoni #Toys #R #Us #Rave #Jesus #RaveJesus #PatreonGoals

Apr 18, 2018

EPISODE #93-- Today's stories include gold falling from the sky, the death of a snake-kisser, a conspiracy theorist politician, and Jesus' return and robbery of a Pizza Hut. Plus, we talk about other conspiracy theories and what Jay-Z is like on his off days. Support our show at Patreon.com/quality. Follow James on twitter @kislingtwits and Alex @giraffetermath. Thanks to Sef Joosten for our show art (http://spexdoodles.tumblr.com). Our theme music is "The World's a Mess" by X. Thanks to our sources at New York Times, BBC, Washington Post, WBRI-NC, and WFMY. #Russia #Gold #PizzaHut #Jesus #Christ #Snakes #Conspiracies #MKUltra #JayZ #DayZ #DayJ #DrJ #WoundCube

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